What It's Like Being a Vampire

If Nana were to chat with someone other than Chef Xiang, Yang Zhen’er would also hide and eavesdrop on their gossip.

But now, Nana is chatting with some unknown entity. The conversation seems reciprocal, yet she can’t hear any voice from the other end and Nana isn’t wearing headphones or video chatting with someone…

Several horror movie scenarios are racing through Yang Zhen’er’s mind; she’s as nervous as a cat on a hot tin roof. Her palms are sweaty, her forehead is cold.

But in there lies her best friend. Despite her fear, Yang Zhen’er pokes her head in and quavers, “Nana, who are you talking to?”

Not having heard the door open and unaware of Yang Zhen’er’s return, Tang Baona startles from the bed, clearly taken by surprise.

She looks terrifiedly at the head sticking out of the doorway. Upon confirming it is Yang Zhen’er, Tang Baona lets out a sigh of relief, can’t help but grabs a pillow and tosses it at her:

“Old Three Yang, why didn’t you make a noise when you came back? Sneaking around like a thief.”

Yang Zhen’er catches the pillow and, with a hushed anxiety, repeats her question: “Nana, who were you talking to just now?”

“Ah?” Tang Baona is taken aback, unconsciously touching her temples and replying, “No one, I wasn’t talking to anyone.”

Yang Zhen’er looks suspiciously at Nana: “Really?”

“By the way, did Xiao Lingdang go to bed so early today? Is Sister Lin back?” Tang Baona tries to “naturally” change the subject.

Yang Zhen’er doesn’t fall for it: “I clearly heard you talking just now, you were saying things like ‘Am I the cute type, or the melancholic type, or the dignified type.’ ‘I’m hungry, I’m going to order take-out, do you want some?\'”

Tang Baona immediately refutes: “No! I didn’t say that! I said ‘Does my voice suit cute songs, or melancholic songs, or dignified ones…’ It sounds like you’re asking whether I’m cute or melancholic.”

“Ha! Is that an admission?! Spill it, who were you talking to?” Yang Zhen’er immediately demands.

“I didn’t talk to anyone. I was just mumbling to myself, considering my singing style. Look, nobody is in the room,” Tang Baona says with feigned righteousness. Then looking at Yang Zhen’er standing in the doorway, she says: “Why are you just standing there? Come in. What are you afraid of? Don’t tell me you think there’s an invisible person in this room?”

Holding the pillow, Yang Zhen’er hesitantly enters the room. Near the bed, she suddenly throws the pillow on Tang Baona’s head, then rushes towards the wardrobe, quickly pulling the doors open. After a thorough inspection, she rushes back to the bedside, crouches down to look under the bed, then realizes the bed is directly attached to the floor. Unable to find anything, she stands up, sheepishly brushing her hand.

Tang Baona, dumbfounded with the pillow, laughs at Yang Zhen’er’s somewhat ridiculous actions: “Old Three Yang! Are you… Are you acting like you’re catching an affair? Ha! ‘Old Three catching an affair’ is kind of rhyming… ”

Yang Zhen’er gives her a look but says nothing. She continues towards the window, pulling back the curtain to look out, even opening it to peek down.

“There’s absolutely nobody here. I was just looking for some songs to record a video when I had some time. I haven’t updated my Bilibili channel for a long time,” Tang Baona says. “With you and Xiao Lingdang gone, I was feeling all lonely and cold. So, I just talked to myself. Zhen’er, are you hungry? Let’s order take-out…”

Before Tang Baona can finish, Yang Zhen’er interrupts: “You’re lying!”

“No, I…” Tang Baona denies weakly, seeing Yang Zhen’er operate on her phone, she thought she might have secretly recorded the conversation and revealed her interactions with the “Little Elf”. She can’t help but feel unease recalling the past.

To her surprise, after fiddling with the phone, Yang Zhen’er starts playing the infamous execution song from Detective Conan. She turns down the volume, places the phone in front of her body, and then puts on Nana’s computer glasses. She then paces the room and declares,

“Nana! As your several decades-long friend, I know you like the back of my hand. You, you can’t fool me with your lies!”

“Nana, you, a little fairy born with a golden spoon, do not know how to lie!”

“Didn’t you see it? When you lie, you unconsciously touch your hair, either on the side or at the end. Additionally, when you lie, you can’t maintain eye contact, you always look to the side, mostly the right! After lying, you purse your lips! It’s all so obvious!”

“Besides, as your best friend, roommate for many years, and loyal assitant manager, haven’t I seen you talk to yourself? When talking to yourself, you’re super dramatic, impersonating two roles, but just now you were clearly only speaking as yourself without any response!”

“More importantly, when I first asked you who you were talking to, you were evasive and sidestepped the question! So there must be something!”

“In conclusion, Nana, you were not talking to yourself just now, but communicating with something…or someone! Come clean, Nana!”

Yang Zhen’er finishes, presses a button on her phone to stop the background music, then fixes Tang Baona with what she believes to be an intimidating stare.

Tang Baona looks stunned at first, then slowly rises, reaches out and grabs Yang Zhen’er’s cheeks, lightly pinching and rolling them, “You are not the Yang Old Three I know. You are Old Xia, right? Hurry up and remove Old Three’s skin and show your true self!”

“Go away, Nana, you can’t deflect the topic. Confess now!” Yang Zhen’er pushes away Nana’s hands, maintaining her “stern” demeanor.

“There’s truly nothing. You saw there was no one in the room…” Tang Baona says, her hand rising to touch her hair. Recalling Zhen’er’s words from earlier, she continues stretching and mimics yawning.

“Hey hey hey, see, there it is again. You’re pursing your lips, and you can’t stop smiling. You know you can’t lie, Nana. You’re even close to laughing!” Yang Zhen’er gets closer to her friend’s face and gives it a thorough look. “From the looks of it, you don’t seem to be possessed.”

“Pfft, why would I be possessed? You big head ghost! I’m starving to death. Move away, I’m going to make some instant noodles.” Tang Baona gets up, heads towards the room’s doorway. Just as she’s about to leave the room, she turns back to Yang Zhen’er, “Oh right, Old Three, are you hungry? Would you bottom up for me?”

Finishing her provocative joke, Tang Baona exits the room snickering, leaving a stunned Yang Lao San alone in the room, not quite caught up with what just happened.

However, in the end, Yang Zhen Er went over to join Tang Baona in cooking instant noodles. After eating and having a merry time, she went to bathe and get ready for bed.

Lying in bed, Yang Zhen Er cast a glance at her best friend, who was sharing the bed with her, and felt a sudden pang of melancholy.

She could sense that Nana was definitely hiding a secret from her—after being friends for so many years, she understood Nana too well.

She had planned to discuss the strange phenomenon observed that evening with Nana once she got home, pondering whether Xiao Lingdang might have acquired superpowers or if some supernatural event had transpired.

But surprisingly, not only was Xiao Lingdang hiding a secret, but so was Nana.

On further thought, Xiao Pingguo was obviously hiding something as well. The training methods related to “object sensing” she spoke about seemed akin to superpowers. And now, in Chongyun Village, within the very house they resided in, she moved with such ease—walking, picking up things, and so on—showing no signs of being unable to see. Even when climbing mountains, she moved faster than herself.

Canary also displayed unusual behavior. She had searched online. Conceptually, a guide bird only existed as an idea. Nobody had really been able to train a bird to assist the visually impaired. Yet Canary acted highly sentient, exceeding the intelligence of her friend’s border collie. Besides, it was so fat that most people couldn’t recognize it as a canary. Seven out of ten would likely mistake it for a pigeon!

Even her cousin “Big Guy,” after returning from Burma, was behaving mysteriously. Initially, he’d discuss the “hypotheses” related to his rescue in Burma, but he stopped doing so later. It looked as if he’d figured things out and now looked down upon her “inferences.”

As for Old Xia, he was a man full of secrets since childhood.

Brother Xiang, the chef… he undoubtedly had the most secrets. Probably, due to the overwhelming number of secrets, it was exhausting to hide them, causing his hair to fall out!

Everyone had secrets, and nobody told her.

Yang Zhen Er lay in bed, suddenly feeling lonely and cold. She curled up on her side, hugging her knees and feeling sorry for herself.

Tang Baona, sleeping on the other side, wasn’t asleep yet. Just like how Yang Zhen Er could tell at a glance whether or not she was lying, she too understood her friend Yang Zhen Er equally well.

Thus, she could keenly sense Yang Zhen Er’s mood change. She moved closer and hugged her friend from behind, “Zhen’er, you’re always my very, very best friend. You know, I trust you always. Be good, goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” said Yang Zhen Er, her mood brightening.

Tang Baona was also somewhat hesitant, not sure whether to disclose the existence of the “Little Elf” to Yang Zhen Er.

But in the end, she decided not to share it. Even though Yang Zhen Er had a highly imaginative mind, always teeming with various whimsical conjectures, the incident with the “Little Elf” was actually genuine and not a joke or speculation. Moreover, she didn’t have any concrete evidence to prove the existence of the “Little Elf.” Even if she tried to do so through changes in light, the “Little Elf” might not respond.

Besides, she wasn’t sure if the “Little Elf” was willing to let its existence be known by Zhen’er, and how it might affect the “Little Elf” and Zhen’er.

The next day was the weekend, and as there were several new projects to start, Tang Baona and Shiling’s Mom had to go to the office. So, Yang Zhen’er went early to play the role of “nanny”, taking the Little Fatty Girl out to play – surprisingly, the place the Little Fatty Girl requested to go was not an amusement park or a mall, but a bookstore.

In the bookstore, Liu Shiling looked up with her little head, wandering around in the popular science books section. From time to time, she asked Yang Zhen’er how to read the titles of books she did not understand, and what they meant.

“This one is called The Mysterious World of Quantum … um, not the magic world, but the mysterious world – the ‘mysterious’ in mysterious. What does quantum mean? Well, quantum is something related to physics, which you can’t learn yet, even if you see it, you won’t understand! Can you learn it in junior high school? It should… no, no! You can’t learn it in junior high school either! You have to wait until you grow up, like your Old Xia… your barbecue wings sister who’s read many books. Neither of us can understand this book. You can’t, and so can I.” While Yang Zhen’er was talking, she was turning the pages when she suddenly exclaimed, “Ah? This is a comic book?”

After taking a glance and finding that it seemed to be understandable, Yang Zhen’er decisively took the book and confidently said, “We’ll buy this one. I’ll have Old Fairy sister read it to you tonight!”

As Liu Shiling continued to wander around the bookshelves, Yang Zhen’er couldn’t help but ask, “Xiao Lingdang, I have a question. Suppose…you have a very close and trustworthy friend. You used to tell each other everything, shared all your secrets. But one day, you suddenly have a secret you don’t want to tell her. What would be the reason? Oh yes, you haven’t fought, and your relationship is not bad.”

Liu Shiling thought for a moment, walked over and shyly took Yang Zhen’er’s hand, saying, “Old Fairy Sister, I didn’t mean to not tell you. But I promised Uncle Bald that I couldn’t reveal the secret. But I asked Uncle Bald last night, and he said if you have any questions, you can ask him, and he will tell you…”

Yang Zhen’er was taken aback for a moment, and then laughed, “Xiao Lingdang, I’m not talking about you. I’m not talking about you. I mean… wait, what did you say? You asked Brother Xiang? You and Brother Xiang have a secret agreement? Oh my, Xiao Lingdang, you really have…”

As she spoke, she found that the Little Fatty Girl was looking up and placing her left index finger in front of her lips, her little face sternly making a “shush” gesture. Yang Zhen’er involuntarily swallowed back the “superpowers” she was about to say.

After leaving the bookstore and finding a restaurant to eat, Yang Zhen’er couldn’t wait to dial Xiang Kun’s phone and asked right away,

“Brother Xiang! What’s the secret between you and Xiao Lingdang?”

“Huh? What kind of secret, be specific? Is it about Xiao Lingdang being able to eat five buns in one meal?” Xiang Kun laughed on the other side of the phone.

“Don’t play dumb, I mean… wait, five buns?” Yang Zhen’er looked in astonishment at the Little Fatty Girl sitting opposite her, who was waiting for the food while flipping through the newly bought popular science comic book from the bookstore. She knew very well how large each of Xiang Kun’s meat buns was. She herself could barely eat four at most; how could the tiny Xiao Lingdang eat five?!

“I was just kidding, how could she possibly eat five, do you think Xiao Lingdang is like you? Could you please be clear about what you want to ask?” Xiang Kun’s voice continued to come through.

“No, Brother Xiang, don’t get off the subject. Didn’t you tell Xiao Lingdang that she could ask you anything directly?” Yang Zhen’er said somewhat annoyingly.

“Yes she can, then what exactly do you want to ask?”

“Well… last night, I was playing a game with Xiao Lingdang, the eraser-throwing game… “Yang Zhen’er began to describe in detail what happened when she was playing the eraser game with the Little Fatty Girl last night. “I am very sure that the eraser was suspended in front of Xiao Lingdang’s forehead for like… a second!” She then lowered her voice, moved closer to the wall side of their booth, half pressed her head against the wall and whispered into her phone, “Brother Xiang, tell me honestly, does Xiao Lingdang have superpowers?”

“Did you ever think that maybe you are the one with superpowers?” Xiang Kun leisurely responded from the other end.